Sunday 4 March 2012

Marriage problems.


Marriage: Is Your Marriage In Trouble?

 

 Next Article: 3 Effective Communication Skills For Marriage.

Marriage is not at all a bed of roses. Common marriage problems can happen unexpectedly. Although on the first stage of married life, life for the couple seems to be perfect and without flaws at all but as marriage grows deeper, this is the best time to see the real being of the person. Their personality, attitudes, temper, habits and lifestyle will no longer be a secret but will become a part of the acceptance to married life. However, there are certain changes we need to take for the sake of the relationship, and change even on the worst times.

At times, we are not even aware that we become so hot tempered, selfish and overly suspicious about things, and these should be addressed and changed the soonest possible. If we are asked to enumerate all the common marriage problems experienced by both husband and wife, then we can compile a book to do it. The problems are not enough to be measured because they are as many as the people living in the world. Problems are too many and common as differences from each one are bind as one. Here are the following problems:

 1. Problems in communication. Communication problem is one cause of conflict in marriage. Such problem is about not being able to understand what is meant by the partner. Each has his own thoughts and views; sometimes the need to understand is rejected as they do not want to entertain other's idea.

 2. Conflicts with in-laws.There are couples who still stay on the house of the parents of either the husband or wife after marriage while saving up money in building their own home. This is one problem that couples may face because in-laws can interfere with your life especially when deciding. This is also happening when you have children living with them; your way of taking care to them may be noticed and you may get always reprimanded. Your in-laws may make you feel that you have no capacity to decide for your family. There are in-laws as well who just don't care whatever decisions you and your family decide.They rarely talk as if their sons/daughters are not involved with the relationship.

3. Financial Problem. This is common especially when couples have a lot of debts to pay for. Problems such as supplies of foods, water, and payment for electricity and house maintenance, or if you have children, school payments and other are also a big problem with money that can trigger conflicts.

4. Priorities. Some couples both work full time 7 days straight to earn a living, and problems with spending quality time together or to their children is one source of conflict. Your priorities can be forgotten because of stress from work.Lack of time to be together for some time can cause problem to the marriage.

5. Sexual problems. All those mentioned above problems can cause stress and may lead to lack of interest in sex.Wrong timing is also a big factor. So when you are active and well-energized and your spouse is exhausted, you cannot just ask him to make love with you.

6. Indifferences. They did not decide to marry because they are so similar in everything; couples have differences too that are revealed during the marriage life. You like to go shopping and your spouse wants to stay on a coffee shop. You may differ also with what to do over holidays. Your personalities as well don't match which can start arguments and understandings. All those common marriage problems that can happen anytime are just healthy, normal a natural occurrence.
Despite that, they can actually complement each other and learning what should be disregarded and corrected.More so, couples have to realize that the best thing to keep the marriage is to have shared goals and dreams.
If you know and believe you are totally different, work on those differences and make a change. Allowing more similar interests to invade in the relationship can bring out the best in both of you.

We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"




Next Article: Committed To Saving Your Marriage.

Calling your spouse and accusing him of not loving you anymore because he never takes you out is NOT a form of resourceful communication. Communication how you communicate your feelings, needs and wants in a respectful, loving and mature way. First things first, you and your spouse need to take a moment and talk about how your marriage needs some work. The way you guys communicate to each other needs to change. At one point in the relationship, you guys would never have ever dreamed of treating each other the way you guys talk to each other now.

I don't know what your current situation is, but if your marriage is falling apart because of how you guys talk (or don't talk) to each other, this needs to change. "I" Statements Vs. "You" Statements When saying something to your spouse that could illicit a fight, I highly suggest using "I" statements rather that "You" statements. "You" statements are debatable and can easily make your spouse feel they need to defend themselves. If you use "I" statements, it's a lot harder for your spouse to disagree with how YOU FEEL. They will evaluate what they did to make you feel this way and think of more resourceful ways he or she could have put it. For example "I feel as if I do all the house work around here" will go over better than "You never help clean the house." See the difference there? Just by changing how you address problems could really help how you and your spouse communicate. Timeout For Yourself If your in a heated argument, it's always best to take a walk or a breather before you guys continue. This way, when you guys do talk about the problem, all that anger can dissipate and prevent you from saying hurtful and irrational things. So many arguments that do escalate to a full blown shouting match could make you both feel worse before the fight even began. Knowing when to take a break and cool off before you say anything else can really prevent words that will be impossible to take back from coming out of your mouth.

Take Turns to Speak What you can do is to allow each other to have a conversation without interrupting each other. If you interrupt your spouse when they are talking, it simple means that what you have to say is more important that what your spouse is saying. There are many people have this bad habit when they are talking. This is very rude and disrespectful. One of the good tip to know in saving marriage is allowing each other to speak and be heard. What you can do is stop yourself when you are about to do it. This will take a lot of practice to get this right. Understand You Can't Control Their Feelings or Opinions Most arguments happens because each person is trying to convince the other that they are right. Really listen to your spouse and try to understand where they are coming from. Accept the reality that you and your spouse won't always agree on anything. There are no two people that no matter how in love they are with each other can always agree on anything.

When you accept this sooner in your marriage, you can have more productive fights instead of damaging ones. This can also show that you give respect to your spouse because you allowed your spouse to have a personal opinion. This means that you recognize your spouse as a separate person that can have their own unique perspective. Ultimatums=Death of a Marriage The last advice that you can have for a save marriage advice when having a difficult conversation is avoiding the all-or-nothing kinds of statements. If you start using extreme words like never or always then you are just getting yourself into hot water.

You and your spouse can save a lot We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"

 


Next Article: Improving Your Communication Skills to Save Your Marriage.

 Don't Be Afraid to Ask You don't do this intentionally but often expect your spouse to know why your upset is unreasonable. If you're upset or mad about something, don't bottle it in. When you bottle negative emotions in, it will eventually blow up to be bigger than it actually is because of how long you held it in. If you've notice your spouse feeling a little off or moody, don't hesitate to ask them what's wrong.

Many times they may not realize exactly what's wrong yet. When you ask them what's wrong, give them time to think about it. Don't expect your spouse to be a mind reader and don't be afraid to express your emotions in a healthy and productive way either. Turn Your Listening Skills On One of the best ways to be better at communicating with your spouse is by listening them. When you listen to your spouse, you are showing them how much you care and respect them. It can be difficult to fully listen to what your spouse is saying when you're doing dishes or cooking dinner (or in general, multitasking). That's why it's important for you to stop what you're doing and just listen to what your spouse is saying. Another good tip is rephrasing what you think they said. Many times people distort or misinterpret what their spouse is saying, so it's best to rephrase what they said just to make sure you guys are on the same page. This is a very effective communication technique that can do wonders to your marriage. Laugh Together Sharing a good laugh with your spouse can go a long way especially when life gets tough. Life can be pretty stressful but if you and your spouse share laughter together, it makes life so much better. Because life can get so stressful at times, many people forget to laugh. Try to reconnect with your spouse through friendly teasing and flirting. When you guys are laughing together and having fun, you'll remember why you love your spouse and see how truly lucky you are to have them in your life. This also gives you a better perspective and state of mind on communicating effectively.

Increase Your Knowledge on Effective Communication We are not born with great communication skills. Good communication is something that is learned and if you know you expressing yourself is not going to be easy, look for help. Read books, blogs, forums and use self help resources to increase your knowledge and ability to communicate. You can also do marriage retreats and special marriage communication workshops to help improve communication in your marriage. There are many layers to the foundation in your marriage.

If you can strengthen and enhance your relationship, the first step is to improve how you and your spouse communicate in your marriage.

We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"


 

Next Article: Five Signs For Woman Affair.

Relationship problems are sure to crop up in any marriage. Certainly no couple ought to be fooled in to believing there will never possibly be virtually any issues not to mention things will get much better every day. It's not going to. 2 different people living in the exact same household means some clash involving personalities no matter whether evident or understated. Naturally bringing a different sort of opinion along with a list of values to the relationship is very important.

It really is tricky to develop a daily life together with each other when one person is actually in command of the show. There must always be a good amount of give and take from the two parties. This is a means of demonstrating value. Yet still when ever areas like that are out of balance relationship problems increase right from staying modest stumbling-blocks to big roadblocks with regards to staying contented with each other. Many people sorry to say make the error in judgment in brushing most of these signs off or disregarding them completely. Whenever they at long last understand what's taking place their marital relationship is on course towards the break up with the two parties incapable plus loath to stop this descent.

1. Really Going Your Own Private Way It's possible work is using a great deal more of your time than you'd like. Or even household commitments are causing the high quality precious time the two of you would always spend with each other virtually hopeless. Regardless of why it's happening you both rationalise this separation to yourselves as well as one another.

 2. No Longer Even Relationship problems moreover show up whenever you give up being attentive to the other's insight. Where as previously the two of you had been ready to accept diverse thoughts and also choices now was replaced by means of thinking the other one does not possess a hint as to to what they are talking about. Which means you attempt to setting each other straight. This merely will cause animosity from your mate.

 3. Right from Misunderstanding To All Out Warfare. It is just a little issue or so it appears even so it can cause serious relationship difficulties. Someone left the top off the toothpaste once again. It wasn't done on purpose but you are sick and tired with informing your spouse over it. So this instance you get annoyed and make sure they know in an unpleasant fashion not to do it again. The spouse doesn't necessarily prefer your tone and then the next thing you know the fight is on. These types of quarrels are generally occurring a lot more commonly as of late.

We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"



 
Next Article: Saving Your Marriage -know The Right Thing to Do.

Does my wife still care? Did you ever think you'd be asking that question in relation to your marriage? You probably didn't. Not one of us goes into marriage believing that it won't be forever. It's what we intended and it's what we want more than anything. When things begin to change and you start noticing that your wife is pulling away from you, it's incredibly difficult. You may even try and convince yourself that it's just something that's been brought on by all the extra stress in her life or perhaps you've been attributing it to her having a mid life crisis.

You really need to be aware of what your wife is feeling though. If you ignore the signs that she's falling out of love, eventually she may just ask for a divorce and by then it will be too late to repair anything. Understanding the signs that she's losing interest in you will help you know exactly where your marriage stands so you can take the proactive steps you need to. If you've been asking the question, "does my wife still care," think about the small things she does for you. Early in most marriages both partners are intent on making their spouse's life as stress free as possible. They cook dinner for one another, they take on each other's errands out of convenience and they make an effort to ensure that their spouse never has to worry over anything. If your wife has now stopped doing those types of things for you that is a clear sign that her feelings have indeed changed.

If you feel more like you have to fend for yourself that likely means that she's ignoring your needs. You can't overlook that as it signals deep problems within your relationship. Also consider how often your wife is actually telling you that she loves you. Women tend to be very vocal with their feelings and they feel comfortable sharing them. If she's stopped telling you that you're the only man for her or that she can't live without you, chances are that she's just not feeling that anymore. If the emotional attachment is gone it will be hard for her to say the words. This is actually one of the best indicators of where your wife's heart is at. Her desire to spend time with you is another window to her heart. If you've been questioning whether your wife still cares for you think about how much time she's actually investing in being with you.

Does she have excuses for why she can't be home more or does she always seem to be busy when you two are home together? If you're not near the top of her priority list for how to spend her time, that's a glaring sign that her feelings for you have changed. You know there's a problem when a woman devotes all of her time to housework or her career and little to none.

We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"    



Next Article: Is My Wife Cheating? Look For These 3 Telltale Signs.

When somebody says there is no problem in their marriage or there are no differences between two partners, it is quite unbelievable. No matter how compatible you are with your spouse or how much you agree on most subjects, there are bound to be differences of opinions when two people live together in a marriage. In fact, this is the sign of a healthy marriage. However, when these differences crop up too frequently or both of you always argue with each other rather aggressively, then you should consider meeting a marriage counsellor. Though nobody can suggest you when to seek marriage counselling, you should take decision when you think things are getting out of control.

When you are going into depression due to the state of your relationship, you should seek help. It is not that all the problems in a marriage always arise due to difference between individuals; there are several external factors also that are responsible for marital problems. These external factors may be anything such financial problems, a dependent parent, child from earlier marriage or any other factor. There can be some factors such as decreased communication, anxiety, sex or any other intimate reason. When you see these signs of trouble, you should meet a marriage counsellor. It may happen that when you decide to meet a counsellor, your spouse is not willing to be part of it. You need not become disheartened. You should try to convince her or him rather than forcing. If not possible, visit alone and you marriage counsellor would surely show you the ways to make some efforts to save your marriage.
It will encourage your spouse also. You can easily find marriage counselling experts in all the metro cities and even in smaller cities of India. To find Marriage Counselling in Delhi or Mumbai, you can search online.

We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"




Next Article: The 4 C`s Of Saving A Marriage.

There are quite a few times when something triggers a man to think that his wife may be cheating on him. Almost all marriages go through a period when questions about fidelity arise in the minds of one of the partners. Certain things or events may lead to curiosity about your wife. You can find an answer to this question be giving a thought to a few important things to find an answer to the question " Is my wife cheating? " But if you accuse your wife just on the basis of your doubts, it may spell doom for your marriage. The truth can be determined only when she is caught in the act but that may not be so easy.
However, conclusions should not be reached with just one or two signs, as there may be other some other things that might have made her behave strangely. So care should be taken to find out the reason why your wife is behaving in a different manner, rather than jumping to conclusions without thinking. A few changes that you might notice in her behavior if she is cheating on you are as follows:

1. She may start keeping secrets. She might become a bit reserved and may not speak in detail about things like she used to previously. That means she is trying to keep something from you.

2. She may not take calls before you and will speak in hushed tones so that you don't hear. Also, she will try to keep her phone out of your reach always.

3. She might get more affectionate towards you than she used to be. It may not always be the case that a wife who cheats is always isolated from you. She may rather start caring more about you to hide that feeling of guilt or to not let you suspect on her. She may pay more attention to you so that you feel everything is normal. However, you should doubt your wife only when she shows the above-mentioned signs along with this extra attention. If you notice some guilty behavior on her part, that means she is feeling sorry for her infidelity. She may start to suffer because of this guilty conscience when someone else starts feeling for her.

But if your wife is actually cheating on you, it may not necessarily mark the end of your relationship. Some corrective measures may help you get your wife back on the right path.


We @ marriage problems recommend you, Click Here to enter Amy Watermans Official Website to see her e-book "Save My Marriage Today!"